women are like Abril 12, 2007
this was an email i sent out before..and of course its from a forwarded email some years back when i was still working as a part time clinical instructor in new york…
do nto ask me who mr. nova is…i dont remembre who that is!
before i go and change the life of new york methodist hospital nurses and PCT’s with my words of wisdom on how to use a vey simple glucometer, i would like to share this insight of mr. nova about women…
(i’m beginning to adore mr.nova…lol…sarcastically speaking)
“Women Are Like…”
Robert Burns—no relationship to George Burns—died before age 40, but created some of the world’s most memorable poetry. You probably know some of his more renowned poetic lines: “O My Luve’s like a red, rose/ That’s newly sprung in June/ O my Luve’s like the melody/ That’s sweetly play’d in tune!” Robert Burns wasn’t the first—nor will he be the last—to draw upon analogies to describe the opposite sex. Women are gorgeous, sensual, wonderfully contradictory creatures that drive men absolutely batty. If women didn’t exist… men would never bathe and would be drinking beer, watching ESPN around the clock, never accomplishing anything worthwhile. Still, even the great poets of English literature struggled to describe women in simple language—they needed to rely upon convoluted analogies, similes, and metaphors. So… what are women really like? Perhaps they can’t be described in simplistic terms. Maybe a series of comparisons are required to accurately paint a picture of the Tender Gender:
Women are like… onions. They make you cry, even when you peel their wrappings off.
Women are like… a snowflake. They’re beautiful, different, cold, and melt when they land on your face.
Women are like… floor tiles. If you lay them right at the very beginning, you can walk all over them.
giggity Abril 11, 2007
here’s a video of an interview between my boyfirned, Mike and my son, Atong…
team america…fuck yeah!! Disyembre 24, 2006
Memorable Quotes from ( copied from imdb.com )
Team America: World Police (2004)
We’re dicks! We’re reckless, arrogant, stupid dicks. And the Film Actors Guild are pussies. And Kim Jong Il is an asshole. Pussies don’t like dicks, because pussies get fucked by dicks. But dicks also fuck assholes: assholes that just want to shit on everything. Pussies may think they can deal with assholes their way. But the only thing that can fuck an asshole is a dick, with some balls. The problem with dicks is: they fuck too much or fuck when it isn’t appropriate – and it takes a pussy to show them that. But sometimes, pussies can be so full of shit that they become assholes themselves… because pussies are an inch and half away from ass holes. I don’t know much about this crazy, crazy world, but I do know this: If you don’t let us fuck this asshole, we’re going to have our dicks and pussies all covered in shit!
christmas carols Disyembre 21, 2006
again from my work..happy holidays!!!
multiple personality disorder – We Three Kings Disoriented Are
dementia – I Think I’ll Be Home For Chrismas
narcissistic – Hark, The Herald ANgels Sing…About Me!
manic – Deck The Halls and Walls and the Hous and Lawn and Streets and Stores and Office and Town and Cars and Buses and Trucks and Trees and…
paranoid – Santa Claus is Coming to Town…To Get Me!!!
masochistic – Thoughts of My Nuts Roasting On An Open Fire
Personality Disorder – You Better Watch Out, Cause I’m Gonna Cry, I’m Gonna Pout, Maybe I’ll Tell You Why..
attention deficit disorder – Silent Night, Holy Night, OOOh Look At the Chicken@ Can I have Some Chocoloate? Why is France So Far Away???
obsessive compulsive disorder – Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells,
fun & games when youre bored Disyembre 18, 2006
links to sites that amazes my tiny little humorous brain
generic name of viagra Disyembre 6, 2006
in pharmacology, all drugs have two names, a trade name and a generic name. for example, the trade name of tylenol also has a generic name of acetaminophen. aleve is also called naproxen. amoxil is also called amoxicillin and advil is also called ibuprofen.
the FDA has been looking for a generic name for viagra. after careful consideration by a team of government experts, it recently announced that is has settled on the generic name of mycoxafloppin. also considered were mycoxafailin, mydixadrupin, mydixarizin, dixafix, and of course, ibepokin.
pfizer corporation announced today that viagra will soon be available in liquid form, and will be marketed by pepsi cola as a power beverage suitable for use as a mixer. it will now be possible for a man to literally pour himself a stiff one. obviously, we can no longer call this a soft drink, and it gives whole new meaning to the names of “cocktails”, “highballs”, and just a good old-fashioned “stiff drink”. Pepsi will market the new concoction by the name of : MOUNT & DO.
thought of the day: there is more money being spent on breast implants and viagra today than on alzheimer’s research. this means that by year 2040, there should be a large elderly population with perky boobs and huge erections and absolutely no recollection of what to do with them…
tsk tsk tsk…